Godawful Metal

Azaras · Post by **Azaras** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 2:14 pm

What are some of the worst metal records you've ever heard? I don't mean records that are called metal but are nu-metal bullshit, or fuzz black metal, or your brother's PANTERRIBLE CDs. I mean bands that are, in every conceivable, stylistic way and musical detail, real heavy metal... and yet for whatever reason (they have no idea how to write a song, they sound boring [and bored] as hell, they are absurdly over-the-top) they absolutely fail to have any quality to them.

I'll have to open this with KILLERFOX's "Orgasm of Death", which I purchased. Words cannot begin to adequately describe how lame this showing is. These "songs" are just lackluster and over-the-top in the extreme. The cover art couldn't have been more suitable, too...

Come on people, let's get a real list of complete SHIT going. I want to collect 'em all.

ION BRITTON · Post by **ION BRITTON** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 5:05 pm

Have you tried FORTRESS of Azra? Horrible man, just horrible.

I know that some may disagree with the next one, but it's AXEMASTER's Blessing in the skies LP. Boring, unoriginal, boring, uninspired, boring, typical and quite boring as well.

Also both MITHRANDIR releases are among my awful favorites. Really BAD metal with terrible vocals and a pretty fucked up production. What else it needs to avoid these albums?

Junkyard Barbarian · Post by **Junkyard Barbarian** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 5:06 pm

Exterminator - Total Extermination is a fucking borefest to my ears...

omen of hate · Post by **omen of hate** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 5:44 pm

SAD IRON - Total Damnation

Azaras · Post by **Azaras** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 5:57 pm

ION BRITTON wrote:Have you tried FORTRESS of Azra? Horrible man, just horrible.

Nope. I'll try to seek them out then

Does anybody know FUNERAL of Azra? Opinions?

Also both MITHRANDIR releases are among my awful favorites. Really BAD metal with terrible vocals and a pretty fucked up production. What else it needs to avoid these albums?

Wow, I actually really dig MITHRANDIR quite a bit, ha ha. The production isn't the greatest, that's true. I can see how one might not like it, though.

The Sentinel · Post by **The Sentinel** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:04 pm

I find the second half of 'X-calibers Warriors of the Night' a total abortion

Some songs on Hallowd's LP are fucking awful. I coudn't believe my ears. For example the song Cry no more is horrible

The b-side of Anvil Chorus is also not my cup of tea

And 90% of > 90's metal is comparable to a big pile of shit (overated crap like hammerfall, arch enemy, nevermore, 75% of WOA 2006 programm)

For the rest I don't have any complaints

The Sentinel · Post by **The Sentinel** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:07 pm

The Sentinel wrote:my gay lover

= Hammerfalllll

omen of hate · Post by **omen of hate** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:23 pm

I know that a lot of people won't agree with me, but an album I never can't stand is Living Death's "Vengeance of Hell".

The production is pityful, the vocals are unbearable and the songwriting is ... absent.

I know they did better after this album, but this first one is horrible !!

ION BRITTON · Post by **ION BRITTON** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:56 pm

The Sentinel wrote: Some songs on Hallowd's LP are fucking awful.

I disagree. All of them are fucking awful. Obscure crap metal.

ION BRITTON · Post by **ION BRITTON** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 8:04 pm

Azaras wrote:
I'll have to open this with KILLERFOX's "Orgasm of Death", which I purchased. Words cannot begin to adequately describe how lame this showing is. These "songs" are just lackluster and over-the-top in the extreme. The cover art couldn't have been more suitable, too...

Hmmm...i don't know...the songwriting is horrible...and those "terrifying" vocals...but i find the record amusing somehow! Tracks like "Vixen of slaughter", "Running blade" or "Branded" can blow my brains out every night and day! Running, running, running blade, running for your life la la la la la

Post by **DaN** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 8:22 pm

omen of hate wrote:SAD IRON - Total Damnation

Wha... you gotta be kidding. SAD IRON are prime Euro-Metal! Well, "We all praise the devil" might be a bit akward in a funny kinda way, but I still consider this MLP one of the better Dutch Metal outputs.

Some INCREDIBLY bad albums few have had the misfortune to check out:

KUSTER - s/t MLP '82 (A Belgian disaster. Songs so flat & uneventful you'll fall asleep after a few secs' - if the insane, retarded vocals didn't make you piss yourself laughing)
THE PREACHERS - "Way To Paradise" LP (Hilarious white metal so fucking horrible on all fronts it's very existance is a miracle!)
SEXMACHINE - "Love Bomb" LP (Dreadful german poser-metal/HR - all crap songs and awful vocals)
SEX ATTACK - s/t LP (see above)

For more of the same, check out my Metal Enterprises article.

ION BRITTON · Post by **ION BRITTON** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 8:26 pm

omen of hate wrote:SAD IRON - Total Damnation

Not crap, but surely overrated. It's really not that bad, it's just me (and a couple of others as well...he he he) who finds their music fairly uninteresting and boring.

omen of hate · Post by **omen of hate** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 8:36 pm

Kuster ???

Amazing !!! They're from my hometown. I'm surprised you know this one, you're impressing me !!! At that period, they were even unknown outside the county. It's so true, they were so lame !!

It's great memories though, in 1982, it was the first gig I ever attended ...

ION BRITTON · Post by **ION BRITTON** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 8:37 pm

DaN wrote: KUSTER - s/t MLP '82 (A Belgian disaster. Songs so flat & uneventful you'll fall asleep after a few secs' - if the insane, retarded vocals didn't make you piss yourself laughing)

I have to agree on that one.

How could they record their songs with such vocals? An unsolved mystery.

omen of hate · Post by **omen of hate** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 8:40 pm

ION BRITTON wrote:
DaN wrote: KUSTER - s/t MLP '82 (A Belgian disaster. Songs so flat & uneventful you'll fall asleep after a few secs' - if the insane, retarded vocals didn't make you piss yourself laughing)
I have to agree on that one.

How could they record their songs with such vocals? An unsolved mystery.

If someone has this shit on CDR, I would be curious to re-hear this one !!

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